My temprament and things that have had their impact

The earliest incidents that I remember, which I think, had an impact on the way I think is, the one that involves a lady from my neighborhood. I was very young, and went to my neighbor's house. This lady, whom I will call Seal for anonymity, asked me for a favor as to go to a shop to buy something and bring to her. What that thing was, I do not remember but I remember it was quite trivial. I denied. At that point, Seal ridiculed me saying how dare I say "no" to her? Her voice was as if I had committed a grave sin. Well at that time, I was utterly confused as to what did I do wrong in saying "no". But the way she reacted, made me feel guilty. It made saying "no" a very difficult thing for me after that. I started to kind of saying "yes" to almost any request after that from almost anybody, which I now feel was a wrong thing. I started having difficulty in expressing a disagreement with anybody.

Another incident that I remember, made me cautious about my health. I was in 8th class I far as I remember. I was walking with another friend of mine. I was short tempered then. I do not remember, what happened, but I pushed him a bit and he pushed me back. I fell some 5 feet back. I kind of was a little shocked at his strength and my weakness. I decided that I will get strong physically from then onwards. Since then I started doing exercises daily for half an hour. That changed a lot. In about 6 months, I became strong enough that I could easily upset a boy of senior class in a arm wrestling. That boosted my confidence and I stopped getting involved in physical brawls.

Well I used to be loose tempered in my child hood. As I worked on my body to get strong, almost at that time only, i also started working on my mind, not to loose temper and was soon so calm that many things that were outrageous for most of my class mates, were not making me feel angry. But later in my life, I feel, there are some points where you need to show anger as a genuine reaction. That is necessary otherwise you tend to keep your frustrations to yourself and than pent up emotions normally come out in misproportionate manner.

About me

I started my life in a small town Dasua in district Hoshiarpur Punjab, India. In a joint family, where my father was head of the family, with one younger brother, mother, two sisters and my mother, I was born. My father used to have a fertilizer shop and my mother is a teacher. We were low on money but high on love and compassion. As time passed, my aunts and uncle got married. Our family entered a dark period, by the time I was in my 8th class. Father's shop was not profitable. Uncle's business was also not profitable and my mother's salary was barely sufficient for family expenses. In those tough times, my aunt ( my father's brother's wife), felt that she was not appropriately appreciated in the family. My father and uncle parted ways by the time I had completed my 10th class and we had to sell our house to pay some loans.
Amidst all this, my parents left no stone un turned to provide for best possible education. I was sent to Jalandhar for study in 10+1 and 10+2. Unfortunately for my parents, I could not get admission to any engineering college after 10+2. My father was kind of shocked. In one college, I was denied admission on a very weak pretext. My father in spite of all financial issue, wanted to go for a law suite against the college. Something kicked in me and I requested my father, that let me take another chance, I do not want to have something lying down but on my own terms. My father felt I was confident and we came back to my hometown with the hope that I will work hard, this time, to get admission in an engineering college. In that remote place, the only way to get ahead is considered to be entering engineering. With God's grace, my mother's rock solid faith in me, and my father's motivation, the following year, I got admission to one of the most premier institutes of our region, Punjab Engineering College Chandigarh.
With this started a new chapter in my life. I was in an environment, where everybody was as good as me in education if not better. I was kind of not able to adjust, having the habit of being in considered the top brass, I was doing average in class. Slowly, with time, I got adjusted to being average. But one thing was there. Everyone in the class, how so ever average, had a confidence that we will go places and I also was infected with the confidence and started working to improve my personality.
At the end of four years, I got campus placement in Patni Computer Systems, Mumbai. There I flourished under the guidance of Mr Spandhan Choudury, Suresh Rane, Dippan Talsania, Aarti Ranade and last but not the least Bharati Belsare and Meera Iyer. Only issue that led me to part with Patni was that I felt, I was grossly under payed for my skills and experience. I parted ways with Patni to join Computer Associates Hyderabad after serving in Patni for 4 years. Unfortunately for both myself and Computer Associates, I became aware that I was under payed in that organisation too as the salary structure was based on my previous pay structure. On top of that I had some ideological differences with my immediate reporting to. I left in a very short time about 9 months.
Here, my life took another turn. I joined Motorola Hyderabad. I progressed based on the strong base Patni provided. I also got married while I was in Motorola. Eventually I became technical lead in technology unit. We(the team) completed a project all by ourselves. That was the best feeling. Again by the time I was around 3 years in Motorola, the organisation started loosing market share and went on a cost cutting mode. Where, I had some financial responsibilities still spilling over from the dark period of our family, I decided to move on to better shoulder my responsibilities.
This time I ended up at Barclays in Singapore. That is where I am right now.